First Love
First Love
Written by Sean , Ko
Teacher :Kevin
I remembered only beating of a heart. I was young, and I did not know about that emotion, feeling. She was my class-mate in middle school. We were friends since I was 8-years old. I still remembered. She peed her pants when she was in first grade in elementary school. Well. Actually I did the same. I could not define when I felt love for her.
It was like being wet by a little rain. Little rain is not loud. But before I knew it, my body is totally wet.. it was my first love.
Actually , it was not normal romance. It was one-way. My character was really clam. And I did not express my feeling for 2 years. Because I was so afraid of rejection.
2-Years. It irregular me the most powerful thing, Love.
Little kid, Sean didn’t believed in love before. But , after I realized I love her, It was really shock
It was totally amazing. For 2-years, I thanked God that he gave me this feeling. Before that time I could not understand people who fell in love and their poem, song.
‘Of course. A woman is pretty. So what? That was my thinking. It still is now. I could not understand why I was falling in love. I did not find a reason, she was not an attractive woman. At that time. I thought that maybe it was God’s working to teach me love.
Anyway, I loved her, even though I had discouragement. But I had no way. Whenever I saw her short haircut and white skin, intelligent eyes, My heart started beating like a machine gun. And all the blood of my body was heated. ‘I love You’ I always wanted to shout to her. But, I always swallowed that word and I cursed myself . but I was so happy.
Even if, I saw her back, I got her smell, I heard her footsteps. It made me almost crazy. I always prayed to God, ‘please give to me ‘
Well. And it was the first time. I knew sometimes God did not give me as I prayed. It was a day of the third grade. Until that time she did not know my thought or feeling. We were friends apparently. One of our other class mates and I , and she were talking about love. Suddenly, she asked me “Sean, who do you like?” Unintensionally, I answered, “I.. I like you” after I answered, I ran away from that place. That night, I could not sleep. I was so annoyed at my stupid behavior. ‘why did I do that?’ I grabbed my head and exclaimed.
But. In school, nothing is different . she still smiled, talked.
After a few days, I heard she had liked an other class mate. Well I was totally depressed. Strangely. I could not do anything. She really liked him, she always followed him and said him ‘ I love you’. But he did not like her. One day, I saw her stand up and exclaim to him, “please, accept my love”. But, he did not respond. When I saw that scene, my heart almost burned.
After, I graduated I expected. “Maybe I can forget her”. But my heart never followed my wish. Even as time passed away, my heart’s beating and fire was getting stronger. So I decided that I would gave up my emotion. I thought if I were an emotionlessness person, maybe I could forget her.
But, actually I could not forget her until I was 23 years old. After 23 years old. I decided to believed in God. And I found who I can love with my whole life.
Written by Sean , Ko
Teacher :Kevin
I remembered only beating of a heart. I was young, and I did not know about that emotion, feeling. She was my class-mate in middle school. We were friends since I was 8-years old. I still remembered. She peed her pants when she was in first grade in elementary school. Well. Actually I did the same. I could not define when I felt love for her.
It was like being wet by a little rain. Little rain is not loud. But before I knew it, my body is totally wet.. it was my first love.
Actually , it was not normal romance. It was one-way. My character was really clam. And I did not express my feeling for 2 years. Because I was so afraid of rejection.
2-Years. It irregular me the most powerful thing, Love.
Little kid, Sean didn’t believed in love before. But , after I realized I love her, It was really shock
It was totally amazing. For 2-years, I thanked God that he gave me this feeling. Before that time I could not understand people who fell in love and their poem, song.
‘Of course. A woman is pretty. So what? That was my thinking. It still is now. I could not understand why I was falling in love. I did not find a reason, she was not an attractive woman. At that time. I thought that maybe it was God’s working to teach me love.
Anyway, I loved her, even though I had discouragement. But I had no way. Whenever I saw her short haircut and white skin, intelligent eyes, My heart started beating like a machine gun. And all the blood of my body was heated. ‘I love You’ I always wanted to shout to her. But, I always swallowed that word and I cursed myself . but I was so happy.
Even if, I saw her back, I got her smell, I heard her footsteps. It made me almost crazy. I always prayed to God, ‘please give to me ‘
Well. And it was the first time. I knew sometimes God did not give me as I prayed. It was a day of the third grade. Until that time she did not know my thought or feeling. We were friends apparently. One of our other class mates and I , and she were talking about love. Suddenly, she asked me “Sean, who do you like?” Unintensionally, I answered, “I.. I like you” after I answered, I ran away from that place. That night, I could not sleep. I was so annoyed at my stupid behavior. ‘why did I do that?’ I grabbed my head and exclaimed.
But. In school, nothing is different . she still smiled, talked.
After a few days, I heard she had liked an other class mate. Well I was totally depressed. Strangely. I could not do anything. She really liked him, she always followed him and said him ‘ I love you’. But he did not like her. One day, I saw her stand up and exclaim to him, “please, accept my love”. But, he did not respond. When I saw that scene, my heart almost burned.
After, I graduated I expected. “Maybe I can forget her”. But my heart never followed my wish. Even as time passed away, my heart’s beating and fire was getting stronger. So I decided that I would gave up my emotion. I thought if I were an emotionlessness person, maybe I could forget her.
But, actually I could not forget her until I was 23 years old. After 23 years old. I decided to believed in God. And I found who I can love with my whole life.
posted by the blog at 2:21 PM
2 Comments:
A wise man said that first love is only a little less difficult than second love.
Someone else said that the more sorrow you can feel the more happiness you can have. Suffering early in life is an investment in later happiness. Old age is another story altogether, of course.
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