telc students and teacher
telc students and teacher
So young yoo
-Social Security and work,retirement in my country-
Korea made a mistake in retirement. Korea has to change a scheme.
Korea retirement policy is unreasonable than other an advanced country.
Neither retirement nor social security treat rights settlement.
So young yoo
-My father and my mother in terms of appearance-
While my father is fat, my mother is skinny. Not only does he put on glasses,but he also has bad eyesight. Moreover he has a short height.Indeed,he is simple and honest.
Not only does she clear skin,but she also has long healthy hair. Moreover she has a deep eyes.Indeed,she is very charming woman.
So young yoo
-Social Security and work,retirement in my country-
Korea made a mistake in retirement. Korea has to change a scheme.
Korea retirement policy is unreasonable than other an advanced country.
Neither retirement nor social security treat rights settlement.
So young yoo
-My father and my mother in terms of appearance-
While my father is fat, my mother is skinny. Not only does he put on glasses,but he also has bad eyesight. Moreover he has a short height.Indeed,he is simple and honest.
Not only does she clear skin,but she also has long healthy hair. Moreover she has a deep eyes.Indeed,she is very charming woman.
posted by the blog at 3:39 PM
1 Comments:
So Young. Here is a problem I see in your paragraph about your mother and father. You write that while your father is fat, your mother is skinny. After that you give three examples for your father and three examples for your mother. The problem is that the examples are off the topic. You say that your father wears glasses. However, wearing glasses is not connected to being fat. You should give examples of your father's fatness. (Not only does he eat too much, but he also doesn't get much exercise. Moreover, he enjoys sweet desserts every meal.Indeed, he is huge.)
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