Ivan Story

Ted and Bed were in history. history occurred in New York.
This is the story of a bird that could not fly, it tried, it tried and could not fly. it felt very sad, its friends flew and played in the air, but were afraid of the eagle that haunted the place. Tet one day the bird that could not fly, find a friend, Ben the horse rider, Tet told him its problem. A sunny day Tet Ben walked in Central Park, when other birds were hiding by the eagle, Tet was still walking because its friend Ben protected her.
Ted and Bed they felt very happy



Ivan,

Welcome to the blog, and thank you for contributing to it.

Your story is long and good and mostly correct. There are few errors.

1. "were in history" is incorrect. "were in the story" is correct.

2. After "could not fly," you should start a new sentence with a period (.) and a capital (big) letter.

Correct: ".....that could not fly. It tried and tried and could not fly. It felt very sad. Its friends...

Rule: Don't end a sentence with a comma (,). End a sentence with a period (.) and begin the next sentence with a capital letter.

3. "find a friend" should be past tense "found a friend."

4. "A sunny day" should be "One sunny day" or "On a sunny day").

5. "hiding "by" should be "hiding from"

In the last sentence you should omit "they."


That's great work, Ivan. You will learn quickly this way.