Sandra and Ingrid

BARACK OBAMA.

1.
Barack Obama, Who is the 44th President of the United States of America, is also the winner of the  2009 Nobel Peace Prize, made history in 2008 when won the U.S. presidential election, is the first African American to be President. Whos charisma, intelligence, and powerful speeches have made him extremely popular with many Americans. He has been very successful with his message for change.

3.
After four years in New York, Obama moved to Chicago. There, he worked as the director of a community project from 1985 to 1988. He entered Harvard Law School and became the first black president of the Harvard Law Review.


The "W" in "who" should not be capitalized.

"and" should replace "comma+ is"

The first sentence should end with a period after "Prize" and then a new sentence should begin with he (Prize. He..)

after "when" there should be a new subject and verb ("he" and "won")


original: Barack Obama, Who is the 44th President of the United States of America, is also the winner of the  2009 Nobel Peace Prize, made history in 2008 when won the U.S. presidential election


correction: Barack Obama, who is the 44th President of the United States of America and also the winner of the  2009 Nobel Peace Prize, made history in 2008 when he won the U.S. presidential election.

The next sentence should begin with "Obama + comma+ who

"President. Whos" should  change to "and whose"

"Americans. He has" should change to "Americans, has"


original:  is the first African American to be President. Whos charisma, intelligence, and powerful speeches have made him extremely popular with many Americans. He has been very successful with his message for change.


correction: Obama, who is the first African American to be President and whose charisma, intelligence, and powerful speeches have made him extremely popular with many Americans, has been very successful with his message for change.


Remember to end each sentence with a period. Also, there should be no period after the title:

incorrect title: Barack Obama.

correct title: Barack Obama


The second part of your composition (marked 3) is 100% correct.